I know that there are lots of people out there who do not have kids.
Some of these people don't have kids because they chose not to.
Some of these people don't have kids because, for one reason or another, they cannot.
To those who can't have children, for whatever the reason but cannot, I'm sorry.
To those who don't have children because they chose not to, good for you for knowing what you want and making the right choice for you.
That being said...
I have one question for you.
Why do you feel the need to buy things for other peoples children that have- sirens, lights, whistles, no volume control, music, never-dying batteries, buzzers, roaring sounds, screeching tires, never-ending crying mechanical voice boxes, loud horns, clickity-clackity wheels, and just down-right annoying qualities?
I understand that our children may enjoy these hideous toys.
They love you for them.
We love you for loving our children.
But.... Are you aware of the fact that it is the presence of these obnoxious toys in our lives that makes parents all over the world turn prematurely gray?
They are the primary reason that hundreds if not thousands of mothers all over the world need BOTOX injections to hide the deep furrow lines in their foreheads!
I have a sneaking suspicion that these toys are a big part of the reason that there is so much alcohol and sedative abuse in this world.
How else do you people expect us to live with these awful loud toys in our lives?!?!
So, in an effort to restore the mental health for the people in this world who do indeed have children, I'm begging you...
The next time you are invited to little Billies 5th birthday party,
This Christmas when you are shopping for that perfect present for your niece Olive.
Or any other time you find yourself in the giving mood for someone else's child...
Please PLEASE buy them a nice quiet Book, or Teddy Bear!!
This message has been a public service announcement brought to you by the
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