Apr 12, 2010

How To Study Like a 17 Year Old Boy.


How To Study For a Test.
Like a 17 year old boy.

1.) Walk into the house and loudly announce "I have a BIG test tomorrow. I will be studying all evening. No time for chores."

2.) Stomp loudly when you are walking to the door to feed the animals because your horrible mother told you to do the chores anyway.
**Be sure to mutter something about it being her fault if you fail the test, can't get into a good college, can't get a good job to make money, and HER grandchildren have to live under a bridge, before you close the door.**

3.) Come in from doing your chores, plop down on the couch and flip on the TV.

4.) Practice your deep breathing so you can perform the worlds longest & loudest sigh when your wicked mother reminds you that you said you needed to study.

5.) Gather up your books and go into your room and sit at your desk to study.

6.) Go into the kitchen to get a drink.

7.) Return to your desk to study.

8.) Go to the bathroom and stay in there for 112 minutes doing God-knows-what.

9.) Return to your desk to study.

10.) Decide it is too quiet and turn on the radio.

11.) Go into the kitchen to get another drink.

12.) Return to your desk to study .

13.) Open your notebook to find a note from your girlfriend, read it 7 times and smell it 16 times.

14.) Go to the bathroom and stay in there for 73 minutes doing God-knows-what.

15.) Return to your desk to study.

16.) Flip through all 97 radio stations looking for one that is playing a song you like.

17.) Preform an amazing air guitar solo and bow to your invisible fans.

18.) Dig in your backpack looking for a pencil.

19.) Go into your brothers room to ask to borrow a pencil.

20.) Put your brother into a sleeper hold and make a bet that he can't get loose from your Grip-of-Death before passing out, squeeze him so hard that he farts.
Run out of his room before the cloud of gas kills you, making sure to knock at least two pictures off of the wall in the hallway as you fly by.

21.) Return to your desk to study.

22.) Open your text book.

23.) Go to the dining room and eat dinner... twice.

24.) Return to your desk to study.

25.) Announce that your eyes are getting tired, and hop into the shower.

26.) Return to your desk to study.

27.) Go into the kitchen for a drink.

28.) Return to your desk to study.

29.) Text your girlfriend 62 text messages.

30.) Play the drums along with your favorite song on the radio using the 2 pencils you stole from your brother for drum sticks.

31.) Turn off the light and go to sleep.

I wonder how they'll do on the test tomorrow??
I'll keep ya posted.
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9 amazing comments. Talk To Me!!:

small farm girl said...

You NAILED that!!!!!!!!!!

dykewife said...

except for the part of making the little brother fart (in my case it was making my song fart), that's me studying :D

Max lown said...

No kidding

the gypsy chick said...

O my, this is THE BEST! I have a 16 year old daughter & it is the end of the world if I ask her to help with the dishes. "Uh... I am studing for my world history test, MOM."
My reply: "Really, there must be a large amount of questions on Facebook, because that is the only thing I see you studing..." (I am up for mother of the year, can you tell.)

Anonymous said...

Hahah omg that could be my son you just described. To funny!

Anonymous said...

well.....that was certainly stupid

Dana Clover said...

Anonymous..

Thats one of the wonderful things about this big ol world wide web thingie...
If you don't like something... you can just click your way out.

Now... How many wanna bet this is a teen?
Study hard darling. :)

Anonymous said...

Hilarious. I like your blog...

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