It hurts and you go into it KNOWING it's gonna hurt.
I recently realized that there is another labor and delivery in child rearing that is much harder and more painful.
It's the labor of raising them right, and delivery of letting them go out into the world with out you by their side.
Worker #2 graduated ARMY Boot-camp 2 weeks ago.
He came home for 5 days following graduation.
Then he left for his "home base" in Washington state, where he quickly found out he will deploy to Afghanistan in February.
This is where the mother in me freaks out!
It seems that literally overnight you go from Mommy, who fixes things, kisses the boo-boo's, and makes sure her children are safe and sound at all times to someone who has no control or say-so in the well-being of her child.
You are expected to be standing on the sidelines, chest puffed out with pride, waving your American flag because your son is amazingly brave, he is patriotic, he is an American Soldier!
While I AM indeed So very proud of him.
I am also SO very scared.
Never... EVER has there been a time in his life with me that I haven't known where he was....
Never EVER has there been a time I didn't know he was ok...
He has never been somewhere that I could not contact him or call to make sure he was ok...
And.... Never EVER was someone actually shooting at him!
How am I supposed to do this?
How can things be ok?
How can we be a family with one of us in harms way?
How will we laugh, knowing he might be "out there" somewhere scared?
How will we sleep without visions of what might be happening in some sandy place on the other side of the world at that very second?
How can everything go on as "usual" when I know my child is in danger?!?
How do I DO THIS?
THIS is the Labor and Delivery that really hurts!
6 amazing comments. Talk To Me!!:
I know you must be very proud. And I know this must be very hard. And I have no idea how you do this.
I can't even imagine how you feel right now. And, I have no idea how you're coping with this. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
I can't even begin to imagine how you handle something like this. I am 10 weeks away from giving birth to a little boy, and this jump started me 18 years down the road when I will have absolutely no say in what he does with his life. I will pray for the safety of your son, as well for all mothers who have to see their children head into danger!
This Is Exactly How I Feel Right Now!..Proud ArmyMom But Worry To death All The Time!!
Again, thank you! Not everyone gives their children so freely and so understandingly nor do they give those children the right to decide and to live the lives they choose. You're doing a wonderful thing here and I'm grateful.
My husband is in the Army and when we got married I didn't know how I would ever cope! But the one thing that made it better was all his stories about being in Afghanistan. They played pranks, they made up dances and taped them, they stole food and even booz. He thinks of his time over there as "fun" he enjoyed it and is still friends with the people he deployed with. Whenever they get together - forget about being in the conversation - they are telling old stories and laughing their heads off. My husbands SUV drove over an IED, everyone thought he was dead,. he ended up without a scratch, so it wasn't a slumber party, but they are MEN and that's what MEN do! You must have raised a strong MAN who will make a great soldier! Have faith and turn to other mothers who are going through the same thing. Thank you for your sacrifice!
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