Dec 25, 2007

You might be a Homesteading Housewife if... (Christmas Edition)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;

And the Man-of-My-Dreams in his boxers, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,

When out in the pasture there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the non-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But my toothless, over-all wearing, Father-in-law shooting a deer!
(true story!...well it wasn't a deer.. it was rabbits for rabbit stew...
but nothing rhymes with rabbit for this poem! and, I'm sure he would have shot a deer if there had been one there!)

You might be a Homesteading Housewife if....

You run out of tape for your presents and get excited because this means you discovered yet another use for bailing twine.

You proclaim your husband as a "Romantic" because he got out his 12 gauge shotgun and shot some mistletoe out of the big oak tree for you to smooch under. (Hey.... shotgun = romantic in these parts!)

Your kids are more excited to find the first green egg laid by their hen than they are to see their presents.

Your husbands favorite gift is the 200 catfish fingerling's you bought him to stock his fishin pond.

Your neighbors do not have a Who-has-the-best-Christmas-Lights competition... You have a Who-Has-The-Biggest-BonFire competition. (I ALWAYS win by the way!, not that I'm bragging... well yes I am.. never-mind.)

A new Beef calf was top on your list for Santa this year.

Your nativity set in your yard has baby Jesus wearing a camouflage onesie.

You spend over an hour trying to get your cow to understand that jingle-bells are cute to wear around her neck. (she never did agree)

You know the name of the ham you cooked for Christmas dinner. (this year was Fatback yummm Thanks Fatback you are goood!!)

Merry Christmas Y'all!!!

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3 amazing comments. Talk To Me!!:

DanaB said...

LOL what a great homesteading housewife edition! ;)

Merry Christmas to you and yours, hope it's been a wondeful one!


PoetMom said...

Tee Hee Hee! I love it. Those make me almost like living in the big city.

Keep up the great blog! I start my day with it every day!

m~ said...

Glad you had a good Christmas. Fatback must of made it extra good. We ate Butter (our buff orpington roo) with yummy home-made dumplings!
Happy New Year!

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